And Finally...

Chris Berman
Doctor of Humane Letters (L.H.D.)

Son of Brown, you began your career on this campus as the sports director for radio station WBRU. Since then you have become as familiar to American sports fans as any Hall-of-Famer. As one of our most respected sportscasters, you have reported play-by-play action for football, baseball, hockey and golf fans; called Cal Ripken’s record-breaking 2,131st consecutive game; announced Super Bowls and World Series games, – including one interrupted by the 1989 San Francisco earthquake; and earned numerous awards for your enthusiasm and in-depth reporting.

Whether hosting SportsCenter, assuming the guise of the Swami to predict game results, or assigning amusing monikers to the likes of Jose “Can You See” Canseco and Wade “Cranberry” Boggs, you entertain and inform us with your knowledge and wit. For inviting us to share in your enjoyment of sports, we honor you by presenting you a Doctor of Humane Letters, honoris causa.

Ab alma matre communi nostra educatus, primo apud stationem litteris WBRU designatam eras praeco ludorum primarius, voce tua transmissionum radiophonicarum ope longe dilata; sequenti tempore, ut illi quorum imagines in aula athletarum famosorum ponuntur, sic tu eis civibus qui ludis studeant pernotus factus es, ut inter spectatissimos lusuum praecones numereris. Quidque, ut accidit, in ludis diversis, velut ludo pede follique, basium quattuor pilaeque ludo, ludo denique pila minima fustique pronuntias, auribus ludis studiosorum arrectis. Inter ludos a te narratos, notissimi sunt et ille bis millesimus centesimus primus tricesimus basipilae ludus quem Calvinus Ripken iunior lusit nullo intermisso otio, et illa ista basipilae pediludiique semel in anno certata certamina apud quae victores summam adipiscuntur laudem. Quorum certaminum illa narrasti anno millesimo nongentesimo octogesimo nono Sancti Fransisci certata quae motus terrarum interruperunt. Omnia ob haec studiumque ludis omnimodis tuum, multis praemiis affectus es.

Nos non tantum doces ut certaminibus athleticis eruditus, sed etiam oblectas sale facetiisque tuis, sive sub vatis persona quid in ludis futurum sit praedicas, seu iucundis nominibus athletas quosdam vocas, ut Wade “Vade Mecum” Boggs, vel Josephus “Non Ineptus” Canseco. Quia nos participes facis tuae ludorum oblectationis, te afficimus nomine Doctoris in Litteris Humanioribus, honoris causa.

Second of three Latin Citations I composed

Kate Burton
Doctor of Fine Arts (D.F.A.)

Distinguished thespian, you came to Brown to pursue a career as a diplomat, but succumbed to the lure of theater and Production Workshop. You have graced the Broadway stage and large and small screens, portraying women in roles that have inspired us and earned accolades for you. Your simultaneous Tony Award nominations for your work in Hedda Gabler and The Elephant Man earned you a place in theater history as just one of three actors who have earned two nominations in one season. Your Emmy-nominated performance as a career-driven surgeon afflicted by Alzheimer’s in Grey’s Anatomy was an acknowledged tour de force.

One of your greatest supporting roles has been the one you have played at this University. As a member of the Creative Arts Council Advisory Board, you have mentored students and supported theater and the arts at Brown. For your brilliant achievements and your many contributions that have enriched our lives, we honor you as a Doctor of Fine Arts, honoris causa.

Apud universitatem Brunensem quamquam eo studebas proposito ut rei publicae legata fieres, diversis tamen scaenicis artibus quasi allecta es ut feminarum personas, quae nobis moveant animos, tibi laudes conferant, in scaena, in theatro cinematographico, in televisionibus tractes. Non solum palma “Emmy” sed etiam bis in uno anno palma quam “Tony” nuncupant dignata es affici; hac ob partes quas egisti in utraque fabula, et Hedda Gabler et Vir Elephanticus, illa quia personam Ellis Grey, medicam chirurgiae studentissimam sed dementia quadam afflictam, praeclare tractavisti.

Ut in scaena, sic apud hanc universitatem partes, etsi secundas, tamen maximi momenti agis. Nam inter eos qui consilio musis variis provehendis dedito consulunt numerata es, ut discipulos adiuves consilio atque opera tua artemque scaenicam inter alias tuearis. Pro praeclaris factis atque multis beneficiis tuis te nomine doctoris in artibus elegantibus affficimus honoris causa.

Auctoritate mihi commissa te ad gradum in Artibus Elegantibus Doctoris admitto, omniaque jura atque privilegia ad hunc gradum pertinentia concedo. In huius testimonium hoc diploma tibi feliciter trado.

One of the three Latin Citations I did for honorary degree recipients at this year's commencement.

Craig C. Mello (1982)

Trailblazing researcher and Nobel Prize laureate, you believed science can change the world – and your study of a tiny worm proved you right. In showing that RNA plays a key role in gene regulation, you have revolutionized the way biologists think about the functioning of cells, creating astounding possibilities for understanding and manipulating the cellular basis of human disease. Your work affirms the importance of basic research, and your discovery is unfolding in new directions that may translate into innovative diagnostic and therapeutic approaches for human disorders, from AIDS and cancer to diabetes and neurodegenerative diseases.

You have spent your life searching for answers, and now your discoveries have profound scientific and medical implications. We are inspired by your passion for discovery and innovation. You have brought honor to Brown, and we salute you as Doctor of Science, honoris causa.

Veri investigans per vias novas donatusque proximo anno praemio Nobel, nobis ostendisti scientiam in melius omnia reformare posse propter ea quae de illo animali minusculo, vermi dicimus, invenisti. Illam enim quasi corporis humani materiae opificinam, quam docti nomine “RNA” designant, partes primas habere in moderando genitalia corpora patefecisti, cuius inventi causâ disciplinae biologicae studiosi melius de operationibus corporum vitalium minimorum intellegunt, causasque morborum humanorum nunc—mirabile dictu!—percipere atque etiam mutare possunt. Tuarum investigationum gratiâ nos quidem recordamur quantum illa fundamenta scientiae, hoc est veri quaerendi ratio, valeant, illi autem studiosi reperiunt vias et cognoscendi et medendi multis aegrotationibus ut carcinomatibus mortiferis, eis morbis quae facultatem corporum movendorum adimunt, quaeque immunitatem naturalem morborum nobis eripit.

Aetatem tuam in indagandis rebus a natura occultatis consumpsisti, quae in lucem a te prolatae ad disciplinas et scientiam et medicam provehendas maximi sunt momenti. Olim apud hanc universitatem studens, eam nunc ut illustris medicus summâ afficis laude, quam ob rem te, veri investigandi omniaque in melius referendi studio permoti tuo, agnoscimus doctorem Scientiae, honoris causa.

Tracking down the truth along new paths, granted a Nobel Prize last year, you have shown us that science can change everything for the better, thanks to what you discovered about that paltry animal—the worm. For you revealed that the factory, as it were, of the raw stuff of our human body, which learned people designate with the term “RNA” has a primary role in regulating genes. Due to this discovery, biologists better understand the workings of cells, and—wonderful to tell!—can perceive and even manipulate the causes of human disease. Because of your research, we for our part call to mind how important those foundations of knowledge are—that is, the methods of research, while scientists for their part are trying to discover ways of diagnosing and healing many diseases, for example deadly cancers, diseases which remove our capability of movement, and that which takes from us our natural immunity to diseases.

You have taken up your life in ascertaining things which are hidden by nature, things which , brought to light by you, are of greatest importance in advancing the fields of medicine and science. Once a student at this university, you now bestow it with great honor, on account of which we, moved by your zeal for investigating the truth and making all things better, recognize you as a Doctor of Science, honoris causa.

Elegiac Poem on the Subject of Global Warming: Work-in-Progress.

Fragment 1:

quot iaciat fumos quantos ferat aethera ad altum
longum iter ecficiens navis onusta bonis?

TRANSLATION

Are we unaware of how many different vapors and how thick
a ship burdened with expensive goods
casts to the high heavens, as it completes its long journey?

Fragment 2:

Dulcia carpebant omnia quaeque suis
Temporibus; nec iam didicit mare ducere salsum
Silvosas suboles in sua freta rates.

TRANSLATION

They would pick all the sweet fruits
In their seasons, nor had the salty main
yet learned to draw the woodsy offspring,
ships, onto its straits.

Carmen in praesulem Civitatum Foederatarum Iambicum.
Die 28 Mense Jan. Ann. 2007 A.D.

Cruenta, inepte, nunc per arva Tigridis

videsne caedem plurimorum et fortium

et innocentium audiistin non tibi

faventium voces neque insanae tuae

menti novorum armorum et "Ite!" pedibus

etiam suades errantibus de tramite

equos furentes? melioribus sinas,

iam te, precamur, persuaderi inutile

bellum moventem civibus—quamquam utile est

tuis—ut orbi debitam pacem feras.

TRANSLATION

Iambic Poem, to the president of the United States

January 28, 2007.

Over Tigris' fields, blood-spattered

don't you now see the fallen--brave

and innocent both? Have you not heard

the voices of those who favor neither you

nor your raging intentions for fresh arms?

And still "Onward!" do you bid the maddened

team which has erred from the course?

We beg you, who move a war profitless

for citizens--though profitable for your own--

to bring the peace that's owed the world.

Part of the Lumber Jack Song in Latin Hexameters, in choral responsion between the lumberjack and the elderly chorus of lumberjacks:

Lumberjack:

I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK,
I sleep all night and I work all day.

My Version:

lautus ego quippe alta die mihi robora caedo;
nocte cadente Sopor lumina fessa operit!

TRANSLATION

I'm splendid because I cut the tall oak beams during day,
But when night falls, Sleep seals my tired eyes.

The elderly chorus of lumberjacks RESPOND:

pinea ligna focis domibusque trabes tibi curae;
solis luce labor; nocte gravi recubas.

TRANSLATION

pine-wood fags for hearths; wood beams for homes are your concern,
during sun's light there's work to do, when night is deep you recline in sleep.

Ad puellam munere Musarum praeditam: For a girl, endowed with the gift of marvelous harpsichord playing:

ille ego qui fueram crepitantia cymbala mirans
(heu mihi tam longa corde micante mora)
tu quando argutos hymnos modulata eleganter
plectra movere sciens; pectora plena deo!

TRANSLATION

I was the one who listened dumbstruck to the tuneful keys' melody,
--as my heart-oh!-beat the time--
then, when you were deftly measuring clear-voiced songs
skilful at moving the plectrum, divinely inspired heart.